Sky-Blue Pink Unicorns Abound Yellow Rivers by Jonathan Hunter

Mars bars at 3am triumphed Americanos, just. Tossing and turning for hours each night observing the shadows dancing inoffensively on my walls I had forgotten what sleep was. The bitter wind rattling the letterbox of my sixth storey council flat provided me with easy company as I stared out across the sea of grey concrete.

By night I followed my own rhythm. In the midst of the darkness only the faint taps of my feet were heard as I descended the many steps out of my block. Just being another insignificant shadow I drifted down the deserted street and clambered over a decaying style so that it was just me and the wilderness. Nothing was visible, but I knew the way as I felt the overgrown grass brushing against my ankles and my socks tingling with dampness.

Entering the conifer thicket my tensed muscles relaxed as I slumped down on a moss covered log beside a trickling rivulet. Here was truly my world and that was how I liked it. Hearing twigs snap in the undergrowth I knew it was the sky-blue pink unicorns approaching. They had most likely polished off my Parkin loaf by now. Indeed, a ring of sky-blue pink unicorns surrounded me just as the stream swelled greatly, turning yellow and circling around us all. The island we were now on descended down to the depths of the earth faster than a collapsing mine shaft as I held my breath in suspense. The Unicorns vanished.

Opening my eyes I was in a scintillating, charming rose scented sweet shop with an aura of love pulling at my heart strings. A gloriously beautiful life sized Barbie doll delicately placed love heart sweets in the palm of her hand and whispered in my ear,

“I have never seen anyone as handsome as you”.

As I reached across to take a love heart she placed an old Nokia phone in my hand instead. The humongous candy sticks nearby shrieked in terror as I glanced at the screen, but it was too late as a vast, cabalistic force sucked me into the phone.

Floating weightlessly in a welkin of blackness I fathomed it was space. Incomprehensible numbers of text messages shot across the endless expanse at me with each hit a severe blow to the head. Golden winged monkeys sneered vividly at my misfortune as the elder amongst them frowned at his acquaintances inconsiderate malevolence.

Seeing a gigantesque, rusty toilet chain hanging from above I just managed to reach it. Instantly the welkin tore in two and dazzling light overwhelmed everything around. Regaining my vision I was at the head of a long table with many Gods shaking their heads disapprovingly at me. I heard an exasperated whisper

“After five hundred and five years Steve has finally arrived”

Mallard Ducks trotted in neatly dressed in purple naval uniform and laid out a platter of MacDonald’s Happy Meals and Mead. The head chef quaked enthusiastically,

“The best combination of all time”.

Seeing his reflection in his fork Thor straightened his hair before drinking mead from his egg cup. Peering down to tuck into my nuggets a chessboard had replaced my plate as Loki fell back in laughter and hysterics. All he could muster was

“You first”

I decided on the Italian Chess Game Opening move and Loki remarked

“Interesting choice, we now know what path you have chosen”.

Sipping some mead I went dizzy and fell into a trance. Waking up sluggishly I realised that I was at a dinner party at a Victorian Mansion with a servant maid vouching nervously for my attention.

“His Lordship Palmerston requests that you join us for the dance. Your partner Ada is waiting for you” bellowed her exasperated voice.

Strutting across to the ballroom sheepishly everyone’s eyes were fixed on me. Ada wearing an exquisite pale blue dress and crimped updo hair in the Marcel Wave style took my hand grinning with expectation.

“Let’s go straight in for the Polka” Ada flirted.

“I honour you with taking to the floor first” demanded Lord Palmerston temporarily taking his concentration away from the servant girl rubbing his shoulders.

Trapped like a rabbit in headlights I dashed vehemently out of the great hall ignoring the gasps of the astonished guests. Ada dropped to the floor in disbelief, her face was whiter than snow. By the time she composed herself I had long since hid in the pantry in the servants’ quarters.

I soon realised that the pantry was actually a lift as the floor shook. I stepped out alongside the sky-blue pink unicorns again where I began my journey. As the unicorns licked my face they turned to deer’s grazing amongst the morning dew. Back at my flat I recollected my thoughts before heading out into the other world.

In the council flat opposite a petit, curiously minded girl with black curly hair looked out from her balcony whilst waiting for her eggs to boil for breakfast.

“I saw some birdies on our feeder” slurred her dad lying on his couch surrounded by empty beer bottles.

“That’s nice, I know a secret” grinned his daughter.

“Just by changing what we do we see new worlds. If you had not forced yourself up this morning you would never have seen those birdies. Most life on this planet goes unnoticed” she affirmed.

Spluttering for words her Dad smirked “An unknown world could exist at Steve’s flat opposite when they’re all out. I sure like it”

“Yes Dad, my Unicorn toys could rule a kingdom there during the day for all we know” laughed the girl.

Returning home weighed down intensely by stress Steve poured himself a whisky. Staring into space forlornly he ignored persistent calls from his two lovers and contemplated,

“I love them both and it drives me crazily mad right to the bone. I can either let this world destroy me or thrive in my own Life it’s my story”.


Jonathan Hunter is a Flash Fiction Writer from Solihull, UK. He has had Flash Fiction pieces published in the Secret Attic Anthologies and on the Friday Flash Fiction website. Jonathan enjoys writing Romance, Fantasy and Funny Fiction that stretches the imagination. He is a Public Librarian.